It’s becoming a common occurrence, these mass shootings which flood the news, destroy the lives of people and create national terror and anxiety. It’s the same old thing every week. We’re used to it, not surprised, numb.
Tonight, the world weighs heavy on my heart.
I could talk about the sadness of mass shootings, the numbness that I feel toward them, and the tragedy of the deaths of innocent men and women. I could try to bring awareness to the unfair structure of social American racism which brings about racially charged acts of violence, but what’s the point? If fellow citizens fought a war and slaughtered each other over slavery, if feelings were that strong about the subject of racism, some for and some against, they’re probably just as strong today. It won’t change overnight — it might take generations. If I was in the mood, I could ask people to act out of love, to find the goodness in their hearts and to follow the golden rule; to care about all humans, regardless of race, sex, religion, all of it. Because it’s not for you to judge the actions or decisions of others.
God is the only righteous judge.
But all of that would be futile.
People already have their minds made up. They’re already filled with hate, even if they see that hate as love, or as somehow justified because of the acts of others.
I cannot change the opinions of people who are opinionated. I can’t even turn aside attacks on my beliefs, because I’m tired.
In a world system driven by money, power and control, I am powerless.
And that saddens me.
What saddens me the most, is religious extremism. Right wing, left wing, Christian, Muslim, Hindu, it doesn’t matter.
I see no difference; they’re all the same.
More than ever, we need strong moral footing.
Our decisions cannot be based on our emotions. The magnetic field of normality has been interrupted by the violence and hatred of others: our compass is spinning out of our control.
For every decision made that we deem to be good, there is an equally bad consequence. Everything is mixed up and on its head. Right and wrong are no longer acceptable definitions, instead, our options are confusion and more confusion. The only way to escape the chaos is to simply not care.
But I can’t do that. I must care.
I can’t escape from caring.
The sum of our lives is found in our actions, whether they be good or evil. And inaction is oftentimes the worst decision that can be made.
How do we navigate this minefield of violence, hatred and pain?
We need a North Star that shines brightly through the fog and clouds our vision. I follow that bright light, but I’m still tired.
Even in this depressing time, I have found joy. When I see the news, edit the news, and it’s filled with murder and rape and hatred, I’m joyful.
I find hope elsewhere.
Nothing can take that away from me.